'Ello, lovelies! I am in the middle of the Midwest blizzard from hell. Good times! Our office is actually closed today, but I had some financial reports I had to get done so I'm here. I am waiting on other people for check signatures, so I might as well come read some of my faves.
Norma is busy kicking ass and taking names. She listed some of her fave blogs here, she reads the good shit from us every day peeps and the professionals. MmmHmmm! Love that chick! I'm still scared of her, in a very good way.
Tim is writing about why he is beautiful and he listed about 5 of the 1,000 reasons why he's amazing. The post is a real gem and Tim is just too cool for words. I've always said that his 15 Million Steps challenge is the coolest self-challenge I've seen a blogger do and actually follow through on. That shit is legit!
Chubby is giving her husband a challenge and posting about Gluckers (which I had never heard of, very interesting!)
Fatboy Kris is ridiculously close to 100 pounds down. Check out his pics, he's a crazy, tatted up, shrinking beast!
Katie at Runs for Cookies (cutest girl on the block) wrote about being Breathless when she was overweight, I still have that sensation sometimes. There are so many things that fat keeps you away from, get rid of it! :)
Mir over at Two Years to Happy Weight After is amazing, inspiring, intelligent, sassy and oh so beautiful! She recently posted a couple Vlogs and I find her even more adorable. She does a lot of research and posts links in her sidebars as well as in the actual text of the post. She is smart and has always been very supportive. I'll admit I do love bloggers who do some of the research for me, I'm lazy like that. She presents facts and has been very successful on her weight loss! She's also so in touch with her faith, it's incredible. Jeez, look at me I'm going on and on about our Princess Dieter! Just adore the beans outta her, that's all.
Jillian joined Allan's challenge. Then, I just smiled...... because I can't wait to see the end result. I didn't see that one coming, but I know she's going to rock it out. Jillian and I are doing the 'Food and Feelings' workbook, I am through with Chapter 4 and into Chapter 5. I'm patiently waiting for her update. The book isn't the solve-all emotional eating problems, but it points some things out that I was in denial over and gives some strategies. Good read and it's a 'workbook', so I do enjoy it.
Julie is fabulous. You can't read her blog and not feel the positive vibes she puts out into this little world. In this post she writes that in 9 weeks she turns 50. She is working on a goal outfit which is actually a very cute swimming suit. MmmHmm! She also signed up for her first 10k, I'm feeling inspired - aren't you?!?! ***Right now, she needs prayers and positive vibes/energy sent to her Mama...***
I just have to say I adore Cyn over at Chunky Goddess because she drops F bombs all over this mutha! She is a Jillian Michaels fanatic and doesn't give up. She is my margarita twin (although I haven't had booze since 2012 came around....) and is very supportive.
Bailey J is so pretty and so fun! She is learning to figure out who she is (sexy, fun, kind) while she loses the weight and it is wonderful to read about.
Ok, those are some of my faves. I have many others that I read often. I have a few that I've recently dropped for my own reasons. No offense, it just wasn't my cup of tea anymore to read whatever it was that you were putting out here. No worries, life goes on.
No official 'weigh in' this Wednesday. I'm just recording the beginning and end of my 10 day juice fast. I am now on Day 5 and feeling mighty fine!! I have not had any protein drinks, just almond milk along with the fresh made juices. I am going for a detox vs. a weight loss boost or anything like that. The tough evening workouts have been cut out. I walk though, a lot. Always walking.
Off to finish up some work then make my merry way through the ice and snow back to my humble abode to read a good book with some hot herbal tea and green juice goodness!!
Just keep putting one foot in front of the other.........
Wednesday, February 29, 2012
Sunday, February 26, 2012
Being more Positive, Happy, Centered
I noticed in the last couple weeks that I have been a lot more positive about my life and my future. I started thinking about that a lot this weekend. I was looking at myself in the mirror after a shower and I was thinking about the weight loss and how far I've come. I know I still have a lot of weight to lose, but I think my ability to actually follow through with it is directly related to maintaining my positive attitude and my faith.
When I would look in the mirror last year and think I needed to start a 'diet' right now or better yet, 'tomorrow' - I would have some pretty ugly things to say to myself. I would say, 'I need to lose weight because I'm disgusting'. 'I'm going to be alone forever, I'm so fat'. 'Nobody could ever love me looking like this'. 'Nobody wants to sit by me or talk to me at a party, I'm too gross'. 'I hate myself'.
Yesterday, I was thinking.... I have come a long way, baby! My sides are smaller. I have less chins. I have to keep losing weight so I can fit some cute jeans. I want to go to London and Australia (my dream vacation spots), so I'll keep being healthy. I can't wait to be able to run my first 5k! I will not wear an extender on the airplane next time. I want to go on some nature hikes this summer, so want to be more healthy and active.
These self-thoughts are like night and day. I am so much more positive about myself, about my future and my ability to be happy. I am happy right now and for the first time in a long time, I don't see it as a momentary chapter of my life. I plan to remain happy (normal ups and downs of life along the way), healthy and better. Better than I've ever been. More open to love than I've ever been. More confident in my faith and hope than I've ever been. I'm hopeful that I can achieve the goals I've set. I'm confident in my ability to keep losing weight and maybe even inspire others along the way.
I have been talking with my James a lot about religion. We decided that every Wednesday, we would each choose parts of the Bible to read and we do that together. It is unlike anything I've ever done - especially with a boyfriend. I love it! I love our time spent reading different verses and seeing how they relate to our lives or to people around us. We don't really discuss it with other people, but it has helped our relationship grow. Not just because of the passages themselves, but because of the discussion it provokes between us. They're not always 'friendly', but we are so respectful of each other and our differences. I have been trying to explain to him my system of 'faith', my beliefs. I knew I had wrote something about it in a blog post before, so I came here to find it and print it off. I wrote about it last August, in this post.
Look at the beginning of that post, I didn't know what it was like to have a 'happy life' or what it would take to get there. Six months later, and I'm here. I've arrived at happiness, true happiness. I'm still learning and growing - every single day. But, I know more about happiness now than I think I ever have. I've worked on a lot of things that are impossible to put into words here to be shared with you. There are things that I can't share that I've had to work through. I did it though and I continue to un-do damages that were done to me for years.
Every encounter with you was a reminder that I was born to survive
I may be damaged, but I'm not broken
You can't break me!
I refuse to live my life as your victim
I'm more than that and I'm on my way to big things.
Big dreams.
And......... I forgive you.
That's part of a writing I did........ sometime last fall or early Winter. I write A LOT. It's therapy for me.
Be positive. Find your center. Set some goals. Work towards them, because if I can do it - you can too. If you have work to do that isn't just counting calories and getting off the couch - start there. You might be able to do it on your own like I have, or it may take some work with a professional. Some of us do carry around some deep issues, some hurt from the past, some pain, some trauma. Everyone does, but some of us carry that under layers of fat. The fat can't be your shield and it's only going to make you more miserable.
Seek Happiness. Think positive thoughts. Be open to love. It's out there! :)
When I would look in the mirror last year and think I needed to start a 'diet' right now or better yet, 'tomorrow' - I would have some pretty ugly things to say to myself. I would say, 'I need to lose weight because I'm disgusting'. 'I'm going to be alone forever, I'm so fat'. 'Nobody could ever love me looking like this'. 'Nobody wants to sit by me or talk to me at a party, I'm too gross'. 'I hate myself'.
Yesterday, I was thinking.... I have come a long way, baby! My sides are smaller. I have less chins. I have to keep losing weight so I can fit some cute jeans. I want to go to London and Australia (my dream vacation spots), so I'll keep being healthy. I can't wait to be able to run my first 5k! I will not wear an extender on the airplane next time. I want to go on some nature hikes this summer, so want to be more healthy and active.
These self-thoughts are like night and day. I am so much more positive about myself, about my future and my ability to be happy. I am happy right now and for the first time in a long time, I don't see it as a momentary chapter of my life. I plan to remain happy (normal ups and downs of life along the way), healthy and better. Better than I've ever been. More open to love than I've ever been. More confident in my faith and hope than I've ever been. I'm hopeful that I can achieve the goals I've set. I'm confident in my ability to keep losing weight and maybe even inspire others along the way.
I have been talking with my James a lot about religion. We decided that every Wednesday, we would each choose parts of the Bible to read and we do that together. It is unlike anything I've ever done - especially with a boyfriend. I love it! I love our time spent reading different verses and seeing how they relate to our lives or to people around us. We don't really discuss it with other people, but it has helped our relationship grow. Not just because of the passages themselves, but because of the discussion it provokes between us. They're not always 'friendly', but we are so respectful of each other and our differences. I have been trying to explain to him my system of 'faith', my beliefs. I knew I had wrote something about it in a blog post before, so I came here to find it and print it off. I wrote about it last August, in this post.
Look at the beginning of that post, I didn't know what it was like to have a 'happy life' or what it would take to get there. Six months later, and I'm here. I've arrived at happiness, true happiness. I'm still learning and growing - every single day. But, I know more about happiness now than I think I ever have. I've worked on a lot of things that are impossible to put into words here to be shared with you. There are things that I can't share that I've had to work through. I did it though and I continue to un-do damages that were done to me for years.
Every encounter with you was a reminder that I was born to survive
I may be damaged, but I'm not broken
You can't break me!
I refuse to live my life as your victim
I'm more than that and I'm on my way to big things.
Big dreams.
And......... I forgive you.
That's part of a writing I did........ sometime last fall or early Winter. I write A LOT. It's therapy for me.
Be positive. Find your center. Set some goals. Work towards them, because if I can do it - you can too. If you have work to do that isn't just counting calories and getting off the couch - start there. You might be able to do it on your own like I have, or it may take some work with a professional. Some of us do carry around some deep issues, some hurt from the past, some pain, some trauma. Everyone does, but some of us carry that under layers of fat. The fat can't be your shield and it's only going to make you more miserable.
Seek Happiness. Think positive thoughts. Be open to love. It's out there! :)
Friday, February 24, 2012
Thank YOU!
I just wanted to write a quick Thank You to all of those who left such nice comments on my post about 'not posting pics'. People can be mean and the emails are ridiculous. I block the email address, so they create a new one. Someone is obsessed with the awesomeness that is ME. Lucky them! I know I have far more people who are positive about my progress, whether I share it in my writing or pics. I'll keep that in mind. I had just taken a break from posting pics for quite some time, but we'll see how it goes from here on out.
Your comments always help, your support and encouragement is always appreciated. Thank you so much, always. Always. Always.
Your comments always help, your support and encouragement is always appreciated. Thank you so much, always. Always. Always.
(My Modified) Juice Fast Starts Today
Last weekend, I had only coffee in the morning then juice all day for Sunday and Monday. I made the juice in my fabulous juicer that I showed off back in this post. Today, I am doing a 10/11 day juice fast. I've been easing into it since last Sunday and the real deal starts tomorrow. Easing into it: smoothies, protein shakes, yogurt smoothies, juice, chicken broth, etc..
I have talked to my Doctor about this!!!!!! I set my water goal to be 64 and he said another 2-3 cups would be needed or I would get dehydrated. I said I didn't think so on a juice fast, but he recommended it anyhow. He said the herbal tea might suffice, but he doubts I will drink as many mugs as I say I am. He clearly doesn't realize how bad my coffee addiction is! We talked about the research I have put into this and he said that 10 days is a perfect time frame for a first time juice fast.
The Daily Schedule will look a little something like this:
5:30am
Wake Up, Drink 8 ounces of water as I get out of bed (I do this every day)
5:45-6:15am
Cardio for about 15 and 10 minutes light upper body workout. Variety: Exercise bike, stepping, Biggest Loser Cardio Level 1 or 2 (Jump Start DVD with 10 minute segments), Michael Jackson dancing game on the Wii (Don't knock it 'til you try it!!), soon to be treadmill
*Drink 16 ounces of water during and after the exercise. 24 ounces down before I shower in the morning people..... :)
6:15-7:45am
Get ready for work. Yeah, it takes me that long because I like to take my precious time.
*8 ounces of green juice made the night before and 12 ounce mug hot herbal tea while I get ready for work. NO COFFEE! Green juice will be similar to the recipe I made in that post I linked. I will use a lot of kale during this 10 day fast; it is a juicer super food!!
8-10am At work
*16 ounces of water. 1-2 mugs of hot herbal tea.
10-10:15am Walk.
*My job allows 30 minutes of walking per day for 'free'. We are also given our regular 15 minute breaks in the morning and in the afternoon, in addition to a 30 minute lunch.
10:15-12:15pm At work
*1 mug of herbal tea. By this time, I'm finally slowing down on my coffee (TEA this week) and water because I am constantly having to go to the ladies' room.
12:15-12:30pm Lunch Break at my desk.
*8 ounces of green juice made the night before and 8 ounces of water
OR 12pm-12:30pm Lunch Break
*4 ounces of Almond Milk, 1 scoop Syntha 6 chocolate protein shake powder. 8 ounces of water.
12:15 or 12:30-12:45pm Walk
Obviously, making the shake would take a few minutes longer than just pouring juice from my thermos, so my walk would be delayed a few minutes.
12:45pm-2:45pm At Work
*1 mug herbal tea. Refill water cup and start in on that for the afternoon
2:45-315pm Walk and Take my regular break
*8 ounces of juice. I always need an afternoon snack, but in the morning I don't usually need anything because I drink so much coffee.
3:15pm-4:30 At Work
*Finish 16 ounce cup of water from after lunch before I go home
4:30-5:00pm Head Home, change clothes
5:00pm-6:30pm My time to get shit done!!
Either go to the free clinic to work out, go for a long walk (taking it easy on workouts during this depending how my body feels), exercise DVD, tanning, whatever I need to do. The priority is always exercise and being focused on my goals before James gets home to distract me.
*16-24 ounces of water depending on what I do. When I do tough workouts and sweat a lot, I will obviously drink more. I don't know what this evening schedule will bring, because I don't know how I will feel on this long of a fast. I will remain active, but I won't be stupid about it.
6:30-7pm Shower
7:00-10pm Evening
*1 mug herbal tea, 8 ounces of Juice OR 4 ounces of Almond Milk with 1 scoop Syntha 6 (maybe a banana blended in as well - in which case I would use 8 ounces of Almond Milk and 2 scoops of protein)
--Relax, household chores, friends, books, tv, etc..
Water: 80-88 ounces / day
Herbal Tea: 60-72 ounces / day
Juice: 32+
Maybe: 1 protein drink made with Syntha 6 and Almond Milk (evening one with banana). If I have one for lunch, I probably wouldn't have one in the evening unless I need a little more sustenance after evening exercise.
*I also make juices, then put them in the blender with bananas. Bananas are not meant to be juiced, but they are good blended with certain juices. For example carrot, celery, strawberry and orange juice tastes great blended with bananas! I've been reading that citrus should be avoided during a juice cleanse, but I'm still going to have my oranges. I haven't been sick yet this winter and everyone around me has had colds that have lasted for weeks. Gotta love that Vitamin C!!!
*If I feel a little drained and need a little something, I will have my 8 ounce almond milks to grab and go. I also have some raw almonds and will keep my big bowl of oranges - but I'm going to try to avoid chewing for 10 days..... as strange as that may sound!
*I am looking for a different protein powder. I really like the taste of the Syntha 6, but it does have an artificial sweetener in it and I'm trying to ditch those from my life permanently. Any suggestions would be appreciated!!!
Today, I'm technically still in 'preparation' mode. I haven't got all the groceries I need to go all out (remember that 50 mile drive I have to make to get fresh produce!). I also have a container of Fage open that I don't want to waste, so I'll be having with my lunch and supper today. Tomorrow, I go all out!! Wish me luck. :) Good news is, my work schedule will be cooperative with this goal as things have finally slowed down a bit here.
I have talked to my Doctor about this!!!!!! I set my water goal to be 64 and he said another 2-3 cups would be needed or I would get dehydrated. I said I didn't think so on a juice fast, but he recommended it anyhow. He said the herbal tea might suffice, but he doubts I will drink as many mugs as I say I am. He clearly doesn't realize how bad my coffee addiction is! We talked about the research I have put into this and he said that 10 days is a perfect time frame for a first time juice fast.
The Daily Schedule will look a little something like this:
5:30am
Wake Up, Drink 8 ounces of water as I get out of bed (I do this every day)
5:45-6:15am
Cardio for about 15 and 10 minutes light upper body workout. Variety: Exercise bike, stepping, Biggest Loser Cardio Level 1 or 2 (Jump Start DVD with 10 minute segments), Michael Jackson dancing game on the Wii (Don't knock it 'til you try it!!), soon to be treadmill
*Drink 16 ounces of water during and after the exercise. 24 ounces down before I shower in the morning people..... :)
6:15-7:45am
Get ready for work. Yeah, it takes me that long because I like to take my precious time.
*8 ounces of green juice made the night before and 12 ounce mug hot herbal tea while I get ready for work. NO COFFEE! Green juice will be similar to the recipe I made in that post I linked. I will use a lot of kale during this 10 day fast; it is a juicer super food!!
8-10am At work
*16 ounces of water. 1-2 mugs of hot herbal tea.
10-10:15am Walk.
*My job allows 30 minutes of walking per day for 'free'. We are also given our regular 15 minute breaks in the morning and in the afternoon, in addition to a 30 minute lunch.
10:15-12:15pm At work
*1 mug of herbal tea. By this time, I'm finally slowing down on my coffee (TEA this week) and water because I am constantly having to go to the ladies' room.
12:15-12:30pm Lunch Break at my desk.
*8 ounces of green juice made the night before and 8 ounces of water
OR 12pm-12:30pm Lunch Break
*4 ounces of Almond Milk, 1 scoop Syntha 6 chocolate protein shake powder. 8 ounces of water.
12:15 or 12:30-12:45pm Walk
Obviously, making the shake would take a few minutes longer than just pouring juice from my thermos, so my walk would be delayed a few minutes.
12:45pm-2:45pm At Work
*1 mug herbal tea. Refill water cup and start in on that for the afternoon
2:45-315pm Walk and Take my regular break
*8 ounces of juice. I always need an afternoon snack, but in the morning I don't usually need anything because I drink so much coffee.
3:15pm-4:30 At Work
*Finish 16 ounce cup of water from after lunch before I go home
4:30-5:00pm Head Home, change clothes
5:00pm-6:30pm My time to get shit done!!
Either go to the free clinic to work out, go for a long walk (taking it easy on workouts during this depending how my body feels), exercise DVD, tanning, whatever I need to do. The priority is always exercise and being focused on my goals before James gets home to distract me.
*16-24 ounces of water depending on what I do. When I do tough workouts and sweat a lot, I will obviously drink more. I don't know what this evening schedule will bring, because I don't know how I will feel on this long of a fast. I will remain active, but I won't be stupid about it.
6:30-7pm Shower
7:00-10pm Evening
*1 mug herbal tea, 8 ounces of Juice OR 4 ounces of Almond Milk with 1 scoop Syntha 6 (maybe a banana blended in as well - in which case I would use 8 ounces of Almond Milk and 2 scoops of protein)
--Relax, household chores, friends, books, tv, etc..
Water: 80-88 ounces / day
Herbal Tea: 60-72 ounces / day
Juice: 32+
Maybe: 1 protein drink made with Syntha 6 and Almond Milk (evening one with banana). If I have one for lunch, I probably wouldn't have one in the evening unless I need a little more sustenance after evening exercise.
*I also make juices, then put them in the blender with bananas. Bananas are not meant to be juiced, but they are good blended with certain juices. For example carrot, celery, strawberry and orange juice tastes great blended with bananas! I've been reading that citrus should be avoided during a juice cleanse, but I'm still going to have my oranges. I haven't been sick yet this winter and everyone around me has had colds that have lasted for weeks. Gotta love that Vitamin C!!!
*If I feel a little drained and need a little something, I will have my 8 ounce almond milks to grab and go. I also have some raw almonds and will keep my big bowl of oranges - but I'm going to try to avoid chewing for 10 days..... as strange as that may sound!
*I am looking for a different protein powder. I really like the taste of the Syntha 6, but it does have an artificial sweetener in it and I'm trying to ditch those from my life permanently. Any suggestions would be appreciated!!!
Today, I'm technically still in 'preparation' mode. I haven't got all the groceries I need to go all out (remember that 50 mile drive I have to make to get fresh produce!). I also have a container of Fage open that I don't want to waste, so I'll be having with my lunch and supper today. Tomorrow, I go all out!! Wish me luck. :) Good news is, my work schedule will be cooperative with this goal as things have finally slowed down a bit here.
Thursday, February 23, 2012
Why I don't Post many Pictures
Remember when I started posting more and more pics? They were usually of a giant muffin top and jeans I didn't fit into...... Some were just random every day pics of me, some were of my 'no ass'. Then of course there was my total awesomeness in Vegas with margaritas the size of my head. Whatever. Well, anyhow I haven't done that in a while. I got a comment yesterday asking for a progress pic. I'm hesitant about posting one and I will tell you why:
People are Assholes.
Each time I would post progress pics, I would get hate mail. Every single time. Without fail. 'April, you're disgusting.'. 'April, those jeans are still too big to be called 'goal jeans'. 'April, you should be ashamed'. 'April, that isn't a muffin top it's a whole pan of muffins'. 'April, consider slitting your wrists'.
So, lately when I have posted pics.... I leave the post up for a day and then 'draft it'. I save it for me to see and whatever comments may have come in and that's about it. Sick of the crap. I have been taking progress pics, I have lots of pics of James and I (I know I haven't even shared his gorgeousness with you yet), I have pics of a happier, healthier, smaller me........... I will decide if/when I can share them. I like posting pics, I feel more connected and have more to look back on when I go read old posts to re-light the fire under my ass (or no-ass as it were). But, that's why I've been avoiding pics.
Some of the emails are from the same person using different addresses, because the childish writing style is the same. There were others though that were well written. So more than one person hates looking at my fat roll? Stop reading my blog then, douchebags!
Ok, I'm off to interview people all day. We need a new janitor, a new court Prosecutor and a new Clerk of Courts. I'll be stuck in questioning hell all day. The Prosecutor should be fun though!
Is it Friday yet?!?!?!?! ;)
People are Assholes.
Each time I would post progress pics, I would get hate mail. Every single time. Without fail. 'April, you're disgusting.'. 'April, those jeans are still too big to be called 'goal jeans'. 'April, you should be ashamed'. 'April, that isn't a muffin top it's a whole pan of muffins'. 'April, consider slitting your wrists'.
So, lately when I have posted pics.... I leave the post up for a day and then 'draft it'. I save it for me to see and whatever comments may have come in and that's about it. Sick of the crap. I have been taking progress pics, I have lots of pics of James and I (I know I haven't even shared his gorgeousness with you yet), I have pics of a happier, healthier, smaller me........... I will decide if/when I can share them. I like posting pics, I feel more connected and have more to look back on when I go read old posts to re-light the fire under my ass (or no-ass as it were). But, that's why I've been avoiding pics.
Some of the emails are from the same person using different addresses, because the childish writing style is the same. There were others though that were well written. So more than one person hates looking at my fat roll? Stop reading my blog then, douchebags!
Ok, I'm off to interview people all day. We need a new janitor, a new court Prosecutor and a new Clerk of Courts. I'll be stuck in questioning hell all day. The Prosecutor should be fun though!
Is it Friday yet?!?!?!?! ;)
Wednesday, February 22, 2012
Proper Form for a Squat - maybe, baby
Found this on a fitness Facebook page. I don't know if the good form part is true or not, but he's still cute.
Weigh In - 70 Pounds Gone FOREVER
June 6, 2011: 311
Feb 15, 2012: 242
Feb 22, 2012: 241
Hello, 70 pounds lost - nice to meet you! :)
Losing more than 1 pound would have been nice, but it wasn't my week to do that and life goes on. I am very happy with this number.
70 Pounds Down:
1. I can wrap a bath towel around me and it covers everything.
2. I can just look down when I stand on the scale and see the number. I used to have too much belly to see my feet or the number on the scale so I had to bend forward to look at the number.
3. I used to squeeze myself into a size 26/28, but I think my true size was a 30/32. I wore a lot of elastic waist band, cotton pants - they are not cute and I threw them all away!!!! I now wear 18-22 depending on the brand. Ten sizes down!!! I can shop at more stores for clothes. I can't wait to see how many more shopping opportunities open up for me. The size range is crazy, but this bottom belly roll and extra skin are really disgusting and make it hard to fit.
4. I have moved the driver seat in my car forward, it was back as far as it could go so that I could fit behind the steering wheel. Now there is a lot more space and I can reach the gas & brake pedals a lot easier since the seat isn't so far back!
5. I met James about 20 pounds ago, the comparison in the sex then and now is amazing. I think the best part is that I am a lot more confident and I have SO much more energy. I met him right after the crazy, criminal stalker period of my life when things started to finally improve. I am so much more happy and it really comes through in our relationship and in our bedroom. Thinking back to sex at 300 pounds, there is no comparison. However enjoyable it may have been, I still felt a little miserable because it took so much out of me since I was so out of shape and fat. I'm less fat now and I'm in better shape physically and emotionally, so it's a major improvement!!! It can only get better, which is saying a lot because it's pretty freakin' hot right now. Meeeeowww!!!
6. My face is so much more clear. I didn't have a huge problem with acne, but it came in spurts and I also got cystic acne. That makes a girl miserable and there is nothing that can be done about it. I haven't had that for months now and even during my TOM, I don't have breakouts other than maybe 1 or 2 spots. I have a very oily T-zone on my face, but even that has improved drastically. I used to have to use the oil blotting sheets and blotting powder several times a day to keep my face from looking like an oil slick. The overall skin type is still 'oily', but I use less blotting sheets and can just do a quick touch up with translucent powder and move on with my day. I am so happy about this!!!!
Alrite, kids. That's the weight update, I'm walking on sunshine right now!! Off to an all day meeting in a few minutes..... Never give up or let people beat you down or break you. Keep fighting for your self and your health.
You're.Worth.It.
Feb 15, 2012: 242
Feb 22, 2012: 241
Hello, 70 pounds lost - nice to meet you! :)
Losing more than 1 pound would have been nice, but it wasn't my week to do that and life goes on. I am very happy with this number.
70 Pounds Down:
1. I can wrap a bath towel around me and it covers everything.
2. I can just look down when I stand on the scale and see the number. I used to have too much belly to see my feet or the number on the scale so I had to bend forward to look at the number.
3. I used to squeeze myself into a size 26/28, but I think my true size was a 30/32. I wore a lot of elastic waist band, cotton pants - they are not cute and I threw them all away!!!! I now wear 18-22 depending on the brand. Ten sizes down!!! I can shop at more stores for clothes. I can't wait to see how many more shopping opportunities open up for me. The size range is crazy, but this bottom belly roll and extra skin are really disgusting and make it hard to fit.
4. I have moved the driver seat in my car forward, it was back as far as it could go so that I could fit behind the steering wheel. Now there is a lot more space and I can reach the gas & brake pedals a lot easier since the seat isn't so far back!
5. I met James about 20 pounds ago, the comparison in the sex then and now is amazing. I think the best part is that I am a lot more confident and I have SO much more energy. I met him right after the crazy, criminal stalker period of my life when things started to finally improve. I am so much more happy and it really comes through in our relationship and in our bedroom. Thinking back to sex at 300 pounds, there is no comparison. However enjoyable it may have been, I still felt a little miserable because it took so much out of me since I was so out of shape and fat. I'm less fat now and I'm in better shape physically and emotionally, so it's a major improvement!!! It can only get better, which is saying a lot because it's pretty freakin' hot right now. Meeeeowww!!!
6. My face is so much more clear. I didn't have a huge problem with acne, but it came in spurts and I also got cystic acne. That makes a girl miserable and there is nothing that can be done about it. I haven't had that for months now and even during my TOM, I don't have breakouts other than maybe 1 or 2 spots. I have a very oily T-zone on my face, but even that has improved drastically. I used to have to use the oil blotting sheets and blotting powder several times a day to keep my face from looking like an oil slick. The overall skin type is still 'oily', but I use less blotting sheets and can just do a quick touch up with translucent powder and move on with my day. I am so happy about this!!!!
Alrite, kids. That's the weight update, I'm walking on sunshine right now!! Off to an all day meeting in a few minutes..... Never give up or let people beat you down or break you. Keep fighting for your self and your health.
You're.Worth.It.
Tuesday, February 21, 2012
Fat Tuesday....... STFU
I've had about four invitations out to the bar or to happy hour, a big buffet for lunch, etc. for Fat Tuesday. One girl kept asking and asking and asking and I kept saying 'No, thanks, I already have a ton of stuff I have to do after work plus I'm not drinking in February'. So, she said, '''ohhhhhhh, come on - you can drink! It's Fat Tuesday!''''. I said, 'We're fat every day! We don't need a day to celebrate, we should un-celebrate actually.... so shut the fuck up!!!' and came in my office. I think I might get fired because it was one of the Exec people. Oops. Seriously, peer pressure much? What is this, high school? I need to read the history on it (like I have time), but isn't Fat Tuesday, lent, etc. for Catholics? I assure you that NONE of the people who asked me to go do something were Catholic. Like, zero. Bitch fest for today done.
This evening:
Home at 4:30pm
Exercise DVD 5-6:30pm
6:30-7 shower, make a green juice
7pm Biggest Loser (mostly I read a magazine or write in my journal, but the show is on in the background)
8pm Read a book
10pm Asleep.
No pancakes, donuts, beer, french fries, cheeseburgers, buffets, or boobie beads.
I might be lame for now, but I'm trying to not die or fall off the wagon (diet or booze). It's not easy!
This evening:
Home at 4:30pm
Exercise DVD 5-6:30pm
6:30-7 shower, make a green juice
7pm Biggest Loser (mostly I read a magazine or write in my journal, but the show is on in the background)
8pm Read a book
10pm Asleep.
No pancakes, donuts, beer, french fries, cheeseburgers, buffets, or boobie beads.
I might be lame for now, but I'm trying to not die or fall off the wagon (diet or booze). It's not easy!
This Week's Goals
This Week's Goals:
1. 80 ounces of water per day
2. 40 ounces of hot tea per day
3. No coffee this week (scared to death)
4. No sugar for February continues and I'm doing quite well with it!!!!
5. No eating after 7pm (Lots of midnight snacks recently after months of not eating after 7-8pm)
6. Walk 3 miles EVERY DAY
7. Workout DVD Tues, Thurs, Fri, Sat
8. Free gym Weds, maybe Friday (crazy scheduling week and the place closes at 6pm)
9. Starting on Saturday February 25-March 5th - Juice Fast with Jillian. Fresh made juice of course. Juice, raw foods (almonds or piece of fruit if it's really needed) and protein powder. That means more grocery shopping for juice ingredients!
10. Workouts and Exercise to = 90 minutes per day, minimum.
Saturday, February 18, 2012
Example of Horrible Word Verification!!!!
I just typed a comment on a blog, then got this. WTF?! My guess is "ISGA erescus", but I know that I"m not patient enough to get it wrong and not throw this laptop out the window so I typed my comment, but gave up when I saw this crap. Cancelled out of leaving a comment. Sorry! I'm still reading, but faced with this nonsense - I won't be commenting much! This is a nightmare!
Back from the grocery trip, made some awesome purchases. I found a sale on the little 4 packs of 8 ounce Almond Milk! I bought 6 of them!! I now have 24 servings of Almond Milk. The price was a steal, I checked the dates and stuff, have no idea why it was that low, but made the 100 mile drive worth it!
I also found a ridiculous price on Kale! The juicer super food, so I got 5 bunches of the green goodness. A bag of Meyer lemons is usually about $2.50 - I got two bags for $1.11 each. What the heck? I also got a 4 pound bag of navel oranges for $1.98!! Bananas for 58 cents a pound. A bunch of cilantro for what felt like pennies, the list goes and on. It was one of the best sale days I've hit in a long time, so happy!
I also bought a Kettlebell weight and the Jillian Michaels Shred it with Weights DVD because it was a returned item that the store re-sold for $4. I have just sat here reading a few reviews, it comes out about 3.5 stars. Lots of complaints about not showing proper form and opening the user up for injury, that's not typical Jillian. I'll spend some time finding vids about correct form, etc. with a kettlebell. I've never used it before, but didn't think it looked that difficult. I could be wrong. Any experience out there?
I also picked out my treadmill today. I'll probably go get it next weekend with my cousin or a friend with a truck to put the big box in (and carry it into my house and put it together - I don't ask for much, huh?!).
Good day for shopping. Eating was good because I just had coffee, a green smoothie, and sipping on a juice (fresh made in my juicer) right now. Today is a day off of exercise, because I'm a big baby who enjoyed being back in my own bed way too much to get up early this morning. Life goes on........
Comments
I took off the captcha/word verification thingamajig, so you can just type in a comment. It is damn near impossible to read one of the two words they want you to type in, so I'm over it. I did change the settings so that I have to choose to Publish them or not, so we'll see how this goes.
I tried to comment on a few blogs on Thursday and got the word verification wrong 2-3 times, so I gave up. I'm still reading though!! :)
Today is protein shakes and coffee. Sunday and Monday is a juice fast, we'll see what I decide after that. Just need a quick detox because I still feel like crud from Tuesday. I also have no groceries, so decided I'm only going to go into the Produce section at the grocery store and that's it for this week. Not sure if I'll keep juicing all week or have raw or salads or what. Speaking of grocery store, it's a 50 mile trip so I guess I better get up and at it soon here. For you people who don't live in the middle of nowhere - don't take it for granted. I have lots of windshield time in just trying to buy healthy, wholesome real foods.
I was talking to another Program Director at work the other day, and she orders her fruit online? She orders pears and citrus fruits from somewhere and they are delivered every Thursday. She is going to bring me the company's brochure on Tuesday when we return from our THREE DAY WEEKEND!!!! Sometimes, I hate living here because of stupid annoyances like this. Wichita, Kansas - I miss you!!!! :(
I tried to work out a deal with the local grocery store to order me a box of good stuff for the week. Whatever organic veggie that was at a good price for the week - just order it. That lasted about two months. He has to order 2 boxes of whatever, so say he ordered 2 flats of organic pears or tomatoes - he would pick through them and take all the good ones home. He would sell me the tore up, bruised, crap and take the other one home to his family for free while over-charging me for the flat of crap he sold me. I gave that up and just decided I'd be driving the 100+ mile round trip to buy groceries on the weekends.
That's my Saturday, how exciting! Have a good weekend, lovelies!!!
I tried to comment on a few blogs on Thursday and got the word verification wrong 2-3 times, so I gave up. I'm still reading though!! :)
Today is protein shakes and coffee. Sunday and Monday is a juice fast, we'll see what I decide after that. Just need a quick detox because I still feel like crud from Tuesday. I also have no groceries, so decided I'm only going to go into the Produce section at the grocery store and that's it for this week. Not sure if I'll keep juicing all week or have raw or salads or what. Speaking of grocery store, it's a 50 mile trip so I guess I better get up and at it soon here. For you people who don't live in the middle of nowhere - don't take it for granted. I have lots of windshield time in just trying to buy healthy, wholesome real foods.
I was talking to another Program Director at work the other day, and she orders her fruit online? She orders pears and citrus fruits from somewhere and they are delivered every Thursday. She is going to bring me the company's brochure on Tuesday when we return from our THREE DAY WEEKEND!!!! Sometimes, I hate living here because of stupid annoyances like this. Wichita, Kansas - I miss you!!!! :(
I tried to work out a deal with the local grocery store to order me a box of good stuff for the week. Whatever organic veggie that was at a good price for the week - just order it. That lasted about two months. He has to order 2 boxes of whatever, so say he ordered 2 flats of organic pears or tomatoes - he would pick through them and take all the good ones home. He would sell me the tore up, bruised, crap and take the other one home to his family for free while over-charging me for the flat of crap he sold me. I gave that up and just decided I'd be driving the 100+ mile round trip to buy groceries on the weekends.
That's my Saturday, how exciting! Have a good weekend, lovelies!!!
Friday, February 17, 2012
TGIF
I'm in a much better mood! I was home to my own bed and home last night (and my honey!).
I'm on a break at work because people who are selected to an interview, are scheduled and agree to the interview... FAIL TO SHOW UP! Why the F do you waste my time then?!
It will still be a good day, thanks for putting up with my random bitchiness yesterday. I weighed in on my own scale this morning, I have some damage control to do before next Wednesday's official weigh-in! Hello, Jillian Michaels - would you like me to own your skinny ass this weekend? MmmHmmm!!
Ok, back to waiting to see if the next person shows up or not. Fools, I tell ya!
I'm on a break at work because people who are selected to an interview, are scheduled and agree to the interview... FAIL TO SHOW UP! Why the F do you waste my time then?!
It will still be a good day, thanks for putting up with my random bitchiness yesterday. I weighed in on my own scale this morning, I have some damage control to do before next Wednesday's official weigh-in! Hello, Jillian Michaels - would you like me to own your skinny ass this weekend? MmmHmmm!!
Ok, back to waiting to see if the next person shows up or not. Fools, I tell ya!
Thursday, February 16, 2012
Today's Blue Plate Specials
Today we went to a little joint to get some lunch, it was recommended by the locals. I was a little worried, but just went with the group. Big Mistake.
The Specials:
A. Bacon Mac&Cheese (served with green beans, fruit cup, dinner roll and brownie)
B. Bacon Cheeseburger Pizza (served with bread sticks and a brownie)
C. Italian Stallion Hot Dog (served with fries, green beans and A BROWNIE)
No. No. And Hell No. What is an Italian Stallion hot dog? I don't even think I want to know. Unless it's served to me by Rocky Balboa himself, that is one weiner that is NOT going in my mouth! A person at the table ordered the Bacon Mac&Cheese, guess what the green beans had in them? Yup, BACON!!!!
The only salad on the menu was their taco salad. I don't like taco salad. I also didn't want to eat red meat again this week or any time soon.
The Soup du Jour:
A. Ham and Bean
B. Cheeseburger Fucking Chowder!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! What?The?Fuck?
The other items on the menu were things such as: hot beef sandwich (gravy, mashed spuds, etc.), French Dip w/ fries, Pizza Burger (what is that? I've never heard of it!), Chicken Strips (battered and fried), crap, crap, crap. No grilled chicken to be seen. No breakfast available at lunch (I can't go wrong with plain scrambled eggs). No fresh fruit, only 'fruit cups' - the kind in heavy syrup. But they do have sugar free chocolate pudding and wouldn't you know the waitress told me that they have frozen yogurt and it is very healthy for you and it has REAL FRUIT in it!
I asked if I could just have a plain salad with lettuce, tomatoes, etc. The waitress said, 'We usually only have dinner salads on Fridays with our all you can eat ribs & chicken - but I can come up with one for you today, sweetie!'. I also ordered the Ham & Bean soup. Second Big Mistake. It was a cream based soup, it had more potatoes in it than it did beans. I picked 2 chunks of ham and some of the corn out of it. It basically looked untouched by the end of the meal. It was not ham and bean soup - it was a creamy potato soup. There's quite a difference. The salad was partially frozen iceberg lettuce, tomato wedges, and shredded cheese.
I was so upset by the whole stupid thing, I left lunch early to go back and get my stuff out of the hotel room. Since I was worried about going back to the meeting for the next 4 hours and being hungry, I asked the front desk if it was possible to have anything from the little free breakfast area. I only felt comfortable asking because I have been talking to the lady a lot there and I get my coffee from her, because the stuff in the free area is horrid. She said sure and asked me what I wanted. I ate a bowl of Cheerios with skim and took a boiled egg and tiny strawberry yogurt with me for a snack later. They set snacks at the meeting at about 3pm and yesterday they were little mini bags of chips (Doritos, Cheetos, etc.) and 8 ounce cans of soda. I can't do that shit, I didn't eat it yesterday either.
It's always hit and miss for me when I'm on travel. Sometimes, I'm fine and don't cave in to a single craving. Other times, I act like it's a free for all and 'what happens away from home stays away' - uh no, it comes back attached to my ass and thighs. I just want to go home, I'll be there tonight though! :)
So, I am slowly working my way out of the clutches of carb cravings. This is the worst environment to be in right now. There are snacks and tables and tables of food everywhere. This morning, a huge spread of mini muffins, danish, etc. The snack this morning was an assortment of bars: lemon bars, raspberry cheesecake bars, blaaaa. I ate carrot sticks and I hated every person in the room who was enjoying their treats. Oh yeah and the food is constant. 830am is sign in with millions of breakfast pastries, 10am is break with dessert bars/cookies/lemonade, then 12pm is lunch break, 3pm is snack with nachos/chips/soda/popcorn.
On Tuesday, I ate the worst lunch and supper that a person could imagine, but I did not eat the snacks at the conference. I went to lunch with women who ate the same 2 person fettuccine as I did, and 2 hours later I watched them gorge on nachos with cheese dip, soda and cookies. I was still full, bloated and remorseful. I feel sad for them, I really do. Not in a judgmental way, but just wishing that they could see what they're doing to their health. I remember being them though, I bet ten million dollars a lot of them are thinking of what day their diet is going to start. 'I'll start on Monday'. 'I'm going to start as soon as I walk in the door from this conference'. 'I'll start after this 3 day weekend, so I have time to prepare and plan my groceries, etc.'. START TODAY. START right now at this meal. You are digging your own fucking grave with that fork!
A gal who weighs about 300 pounds just sat down by me and exclaimed, 'They put the left over donuts out again and they want us to eat as much as we can or they're going to have to throw them away! Go get some, there are all different kinds!'. They had the donuts set out yesterday, so they are day old donuts in the first place. She has THREE on a little mini plate, stacked up. Reminds me of something out of the Simpsons. Damn it, Homer - don't sit by me! She just said, 'Oh they are a little dry, I need to go get some lemonade!'
I was just listening to these two gals talk. They apparently came together and shared a room. The one was apologizing if she kept the other one up. She said sometimes her sleep apnea machine goes crazy and has a mind of its own. The other one said, it's okay - my husband's does the same thing. They were going back and forth about 'crunching the little hose'? What?! They're both sitting there with what looks like Chinese food take out, some cookies from the table and liter bottles of Dr. Pepper. LITERS. EACH. BOTH HAVE ONE FUCKING LITER OF GODAMN SODA IN FRONT OF THEM.
Ok, I'm going to be done now or I will ramble on and on. I'm obviously in a foul mood. I'm even more upset about my eating choices on Tuesday after witnessing these train wrecks. I sound like an asshole, because sometimes I am one. Mkay? I blame some of the bitchiness on coming out of this carb-fest. See? It's just bad, all the way around.
The Specials:
A. Bacon Mac&Cheese (served with green beans, fruit cup, dinner roll and brownie)
B. Bacon Cheeseburger Pizza (served with bread sticks and a brownie)
C. Italian Stallion Hot Dog (served with fries, green beans and A BROWNIE)
No. No. And Hell No. What is an Italian Stallion hot dog? I don't even think I want to know. Unless it's served to me by Rocky Balboa himself, that is one weiner that is NOT going in my mouth! A person at the table ordered the Bacon Mac&Cheese, guess what the green beans had in them? Yup, BACON!!!!
The only salad on the menu was their taco salad. I don't like taco salad. I also didn't want to eat red meat again this week or any time soon.
The Soup du Jour:
A. Ham and Bean
B. Cheeseburger Fucking Chowder!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! What?The?Fuck?
The other items on the menu were things such as: hot beef sandwich (gravy, mashed spuds, etc.), French Dip w/ fries, Pizza Burger (what is that? I've never heard of it!), Chicken Strips (battered and fried), crap, crap, crap. No grilled chicken to be seen. No breakfast available at lunch (I can't go wrong with plain scrambled eggs). No fresh fruit, only 'fruit cups' - the kind in heavy syrup. But they do have sugar free chocolate pudding and wouldn't you know the waitress told me that they have frozen yogurt and it is very healthy for you and it has REAL FRUIT in it!
I asked if I could just have a plain salad with lettuce, tomatoes, etc. The waitress said, 'We usually only have dinner salads on Fridays with our all you can eat ribs & chicken - but I can come up with one for you today, sweetie!'. I also ordered the Ham & Bean soup. Second Big Mistake. It was a cream based soup, it had more potatoes in it than it did beans. I picked 2 chunks of ham and some of the corn out of it. It basically looked untouched by the end of the meal. It was not ham and bean soup - it was a creamy potato soup. There's quite a difference. The salad was partially frozen iceberg lettuce, tomato wedges, and shredded cheese.
I was so upset by the whole stupid thing, I left lunch early to go back and get my stuff out of the hotel room. Since I was worried about going back to the meeting for the next 4 hours and being hungry, I asked the front desk if it was possible to have anything from the little free breakfast area. I only felt comfortable asking because I have been talking to the lady a lot there and I get my coffee from her, because the stuff in the free area is horrid. She said sure and asked me what I wanted. I ate a bowl of Cheerios with skim and took a boiled egg and tiny strawberry yogurt with me for a snack later. They set snacks at the meeting at about 3pm and yesterday they were little mini bags of chips (Doritos, Cheetos, etc.) and 8 ounce cans of soda. I can't do that shit, I didn't eat it yesterday either.
It's always hit and miss for me when I'm on travel. Sometimes, I'm fine and don't cave in to a single craving. Other times, I act like it's a free for all and 'what happens away from home stays away' - uh no, it comes back attached to my ass and thighs. I just want to go home, I'll be there tonight though! :)
So, I am slowly working my way out of the clutches of carb cravings. This is the worst environment to be in right now. There are snacks and tables and tables of food everywhere. This morning, a huge spread of mini muffins, danish, etc. The snack this morning was an assortment of bars: lemon bars, raspberry cheesecake bars, blaaaa. I ate carrot sticks and I hated every person in the room who was enjoying their treats. Oh yeah and the food is constant. 830am is sign in with millions of breakfast pastries, 10am is break with dessert bars/cookies/lemonade, then 12pm is lunch break, 3pm is snack with nachos/chips/soda/popcorn.
On Tuesday, I ate the worst lunch and supper that a person could imagine, but I did not eat the snacks at the conference. I went to lunch with women who ate the same 2 person fettuccine as I did, and 2 hours later I watched them gorge on nachos with cheese dip, soda and cookies. I was still full, bloated and remorseful. I feel sad for them, I really do. Not in a judgmental way, but just wishing that they could see what they're doing to their health. I remember being them though, I bet ten million dollars a lot of them are thinking of what day their diet is going to start. 'I'll start on Monday'. 'I'm going to start as soon as I walk in the door from this conference'. 'I'll start after this 3 day weekend, so I have time to prepare and plan my groceries, etc.'. START TODAY. START right now at this meal. You are digging your own fucking grave with that fork!
A gal who weighs about 300 pounds just sat down by me and exclaimed, 'They put the left over donuts out again and they want us to eat as much as we can or they're going to have to throw them away! Go get some, there are all different kinds!'. They had the donuts set out yesterday, so they are day old donuts in the first place. She has THREE on a little mini plate, stacked up. Reminds me of something out of the Simpsons. Damn it, Homer - don't sit by me! She just said, 'Oh they are a little dry, I need to go get some lemonade!'
I was just listening to these two gals talk. They apparently came together and shared a room. The one was apologizing if she kept the other one up. She said sometimes her sleep apnea machine goes crazy and has a mind of its own. The other one said, it's okay - my husband's does the same thing. They were going back and forth about 'crunching the little hose'? What?! They're both sitting there with what looks like Chinese food take out, some cookies from the table and liter bottles of Dr. Pepper. LITERS. EACH. BOTH HAVE ONE FUCKING LITER OF GODAMN SODA IN FRONT OF THEM.
****APOCALYPSE, NOW!!!!****
Ok, I'm going to be done now or I will ramble on and on. I'm obviously in a foul mood. I'm even more upset about my eating choices on Tuesday after witnessing these train wrecks. I sound like an asshole, because sometimes I am one. Mkay? I blame some of the bitchiness on coming out of this carb-fest. See? It's just bad, all the way around.
Wednesday, February 15, 2012
Weigh In and Gluttony
Feb 8: 245
Feb 15: 242
3 pound loss this week. I'll be honest, the food poisoning from last week was probably my only saving grace.
Calories: Calories were nearly non-existent from Thursday afternoon to Sunday due to being sick. Sunday was 850. Monday was average - 1260.
***The highest I got was yesterday and well, we won't go there. Okay, maybe we will. I was just a clown all day yesterday about my eating. Breakfast was normal - a homemade juice (pear, carrot, celery, orange) and a boiled egg. I was still at home, so I was in control of what was available to me, then I got on the road for a work trip and it went downhill. Lunch I 'carbed it up' with some chicken fettuccine Alfredo... with broccoli if that counts. (and garlic toast and a house salad with ranch) The portion of Alfredo was enough for 2 people and I ate most of it. I should know by now that pasta in a cream sauce is always the beginning of the end for me - I can't be responsible when I have it. It's impossible, so I shouldn't have ordered it, BUT EVERYONE ELSE DID. Right? Why do I always have to be the fat girl on a 'diet', making responsible choices, counting calories, avoiding cream and pasta like the black-effin-plague? I think I was just 'over it' and wanted to do what everyone else was doing for lunch. Supper was another catastrophe. I had a piece of meatloaf and some white chicken chili and some fresh, hot, yeasty dinner rolls WITH BUTTER. White chicken chili at that place = cream based cheesy soup. Very delicious, very huge portion.
I don't even eat red meat, so I don't know why right when I saw the meatloaf my eyes lit up like a kid on Christmas. WTF? I was going to order the meatloaf as the entree and 2 sides - probably a cold pasta salad and peas/carrots. That would be something I typically eat when I go out (but chicken or salmon instead of red meat). But, the lady said I could have 2 sides or I could have the soup. I asked what the soup was and said, sign me up. Sign me up for a heart attack, please.
So, that's it. Big, bad mistakes yesterday - pretty much all day. Today and tonight I'm on travel as well, so I plan to go to the grocery store in hopes they have one of those big salad bars where you can make your own salad.
Water - if I had drank another ounce any day this week I may have burst.
Exercise - not since Wednesday. Thursday, Friday = sick due to food poisoning. Sat, Sun = out of state for my godchild's baptism (lots of walking though). Mon = ummm, no excuse really. Tues = on travel, there is a fitness room here but I decided yesterday was a wash. Yeah, I said it. I made a decision that yesterday I was just gonna say screw it, after the lunch thing. I almost said screw it about the sweets and got some chocolate covered strawberries, but I thought that challenge was still worth winning. The day itself was too far gone to care, so I just... didn't. It's been a long time since I said, 'screw it' or today is a 'cheat day'.
Progress, not Perfection.
Carbs crave carbs. Now I'm paying for the indulgences, because my cravings are out of control. I can't wait to get home. I'm going to sit here while I'm not paying attention to the conference and do a calorie count from yesterday. I might cry.
I plan on being a total badass with calories and working out this week, so I don't gain from yesterday and I kill these cravings. I am 1 pound away from 70 pounds lost...... I can do this.
Feb 15: 242
3 pound loss this week. I'll be honest, the food poisoning from last week was probably my only saving grace.
Calories: Calories were nearly non-existent from Thursday afternoon to Sunday due to being sick. Sunday was 850. Monday was average - 1260.
***The highest I got was yesterday and well, we won't go there. Okay, maybe we will. I was just a clown all day yesterday about my eating. Breakfast was normal - a homemade juice (pear, carrot, celery, orange) and a boiled egg. I was still at home, so I was in control of what was available to me, then I got on the road for a work trip and it went downhill. Lunch I 'carbed it up' with some chicken fettuccine Alfredo... with broccoli if that counts. (and garlic toast and a house salad with ranch) The portion of Alfredo was enough for 2 people and I ate most of it. I should know by now that pasta in a cream sauce is always the beginning of the end for me - I can't be responsible when I have it. It's impossible, so I shouldn't have ordered it, BUT EVERYONE ELSE DID. Right? Why do I always have to be the fat girl on a 'diet', making responsible choices, counting calories, avoiding cream and pasta like the black-effin-plague? I think I was just 'over it' and wanted to do what everyone else was doing for lunch. Supper was another catastrophe. I had a piece of meatloaf and some white chicken chili and some fresh, hot, yeasty dinner rolls WITH BUTTER. White chicken chili at that place = cream based cheesy soup. Very delicious, very huge portion.
I don't even eat red meat, so I don't know why right when I saw the meatloaf my eyes lit up like a kid on Christmas. WTF? I was going to order the meatloaf as the entree and 2 sides - probably a cold pasta salad and peas/carrots. That would be something I typically eat when I go out (but chicken or salmon instead of red meat). But, the lady said I could have 2 sides or I could have the soup. I asked what the soup was and said, sign me up. Sign me up for a heart attack, please.
So, that's it. Big, bad mistakes yesterday - pretty much all day. Today and tonight I'm on travel as well, so I plan to go to the grocery store in hopes they have one of those big salad bars where you can make your own salad.
Water - if I had drank another ounce any day this week I may have burst.
Exercise - not since Wednesday. Thursday, Friday = sick due to food poisoning. Sat, Sun = out of state for my godchild's baptism (lots of walking though). Mon = ummm, no excuse really. Tues = on travel, there is a fitness room here but I decided yesterday was a wash. Yeah, I said it. I made a decision that yesterday I was just gonna say screw it, after the lunch thing. I almost said screw it about the sweets and got some chocolate covered strawberries, but I thought that challenge was still worth winning. The day itself was too far gone to care, so I just... didn't. It's been a long time since I said, 'screw it' or today is a 'cheat day'.
Progress, not Perfection.
Carbs crave carbs. Now I'm paying for the indulgences, because my cravings are out of control. I can't wait to get home. I'm going to sit here while I'm not paying attention to the conference and do a calorie count from yesterday. I might cry.
I plan on being a total badass with calories and working out this week, so I don't gain from yesterday and I kill these cravings. I am 1 pound away from 70 pounds lost...... I can do this.
Tuesday, February 14, 2012
Loving Myself
When I typed the title of this post, I laughed out loud a little bit because it seems strange to me. I thought, "Do I love myself?". I guess we'll find out. Thanks Cyn, for hosting this.
Things I love about Myself:
1. my ability to know, understand, and GIVE unconditional love to those around me (hard lesson learned)
2. my smile and full lips
3. my willingness to learn, learn, learn AND apply knowledge to my life
4. my loyalty to friends and family - I will always be there for them.
5. my commitment to my weight loss and health (even when it wavered at times)
5. my commitment to my weight loss and health (even when it wavered at times)
6. my hair when it's big as the state of Texas
7. my dedication to my career as a Social Worker - helping others, seeing beauty in people that society at large would just as well consider garbage and want to ignore, fighting for equality for those less fortunate, shaping policies that serve vulnerable populations, linking children and families to resources to better their lives
8. my love of books, reading, learning
9. my experiences in life and how they've shaped who I am, taught me lessons and gave me warm memories to think about when the world is cold
That list wasn't easy to come up with. I pictured myself standing in front of a mirror and thinking - what do you love about what you see? What is great about you, to the core? Maybe there should be more on the list, I don't know.
As far as how loving myself has inspired this weight loss journey, I would say it means everything. I had to realize that I was killing myself. I had to stop and start caring about myself, about my body. I realized that my relationship with food was toxic. I realized that as smart as I am; I was being completely ridiculous and foolish about my food choices, my sedentary ways and my health. I dream of a happy future, travel, friends, family...... yet, I was layering on pounds like a coffin around me. I had to do a lot of writing, journaling, thinking, and even crying to get to where I am. I have to continue to learn to love myself, to care about 'my body' and realize it isn't a separate entity from my mind, my personality, my future. It is my future. I focused on career, academics, making other people happy, bla, bla bla... for years. Now, I have to do me.
My commitments:
1. I will love myself enough to lose another 50 pounds (and then move on to the next goal weight).
2. I will love myself enough to share positive vibes and happiness with the world.
3. I will love myself enough to treat my body good with healthy, nutritious REAL food.
4. I will love myself enough to free myself of debt (student loans and 1 credit card - 2 are paid off!!!)
5. I will love myself enough to remember the 'big picture' when making choices for my life on a daily basis.
6. I will love myself enough to allow others to love me, to not be closed off and fearful of being hurt. I will trust people more and be open to receiving love from others. (I've really been struggling with this lately.)
Wow, I didn't think I'd feel emotional after this post, but I do. Time to go for a walk........ :)
Monday, February 13, 2012
Total Temptation & a Loving Yourself link-up
FRIED CHEESECAKE. It is cheesecake filling, wrapped up in this shell and deep fried, then topped with strawberry sauce, strawberries and fresh whipped cream. I stared at it and it looked so good. It looked like a cannoli. I wanted it, I wanted all of it. I said no, she said, 'Oh, you have to try it!'. I said I was doing no sugar for February. I drank 36 ounces of water just at supper that night to make myself extra full after my Southwest chicken salad and to avoid the dessert.
Then came Sunday after the baptism, baby Ellie's Grandma is one hell of a baker. I already knew that from visiting my best friend in Iowa in the past. Well, there was a homemade chocolate and a yellow cake after the baptism. Homemade icing. Cakes from scratch. Moist. Delicious. Beautifully hand decorated. I resisted, when I was driving home - I almost regretted it. I thought, 'Well, when am I ever going to get cake from scratch again? I should have just eaten a few bites of it'. Self-challenge for February sucks. But, my health and body will reap the benefits of my willingness to care, commit to the challenge and say no to the deliciousness.
Moving on..........
Cyn over at The Chunky Goddess is hosting this little Valentine's Day post thingie about loving yourself!
I had to do some searching through her blog to find it, but here's how she first explained it:
"so I am thinking of doing a link-up meme for valentines day?
what is a meme you ask?
well… a meme (rhymes with theme which i just found out) is kind of like a chain letter (for those of us old enough to remember those). basically it’s a quiz, questionaire, topic and/or common theme that a bevy of bloggers will pass around, write about & link up to.
(hope that makes sense?)
anywho…
valentine’s day is usually associated with showing our love for that special someone or someones in our life. i would like to change things up a bit & focus on loving ourselves – the importance of it & how it has affected (or is it effected – i always screw them up) your journey.
and no it doesn’t have to be JUST about weight loss – all of my non-weight loss bloggy peeps are MORE than welcome to link up!
the link will be opened from february 13th until midnight on february 14th & i would love if everyone wrote a post about loving yourself/what it means/how you do it/not loving yourself enough/etc & whatever take on the subject you want to write about. it can be heartfelt, serious, inspirational, funny, whatever – or a mix of it all! just put your own twist & style into it!
then just link up your post & have fun hoppin’ around reading everyone’s posts as well & hopefully be inspired & feel the bloggy l♥ve!" <<<From Cyn's blog
Here's the post to which you can link your post if you want to write on such a subject:
http://thechunkygoddess.com/2012/02/13/meme-valentines-day-2012-the-day-of-loving-you/
I am going to work on a post for this, because I have been thinking it is something I need to evaluate right now. Thanks Cyn, for coming up with the idea and having a place to link and go read other stories.
Then came Sunday after the baptism, baby Ellie's Grandma is one hell of a baker. I already knew that from visiting my best friend in Iowa in the past. Well, there was a homemade chocolate and a yellow cake after the baptism. Homemade icing. Cakes from scratch. Moist. Delicious. Beautifully hand decorated. I resisted, when I was driving home - I almost regretted it. I thought, 'Well, when am I ever going to get cake from scratch again? I should have just eaten a few bites of it'. Self-challenge for February sucks. But, my health and body will reap the benefits of my willingness to care, commit to the challenge and say no to the deliciousness.
Moving on..........
Cyn over at The Chunky Goddess is hosting this little Valentine's Day post thingie about loving yourself!
I had to do some searching through her blog to find it, but here's how she first explained it:
"so I am thinking of doing a link-up meme for valentines day?
what is a meme you ask?
well… a meme (rhymes with theme which i just found out) is kind of like a chain letter (for those of us old enough to remember those). basically it’s a quiz, questionaire, topic and/or common theme that a bevy of bloggers will pass around, write about & link up to.
(hope that makes sense?)
anywho…
valentine’s day is usually associated with showing our love for that special someone or someones in our life. i would like to change things up a bit & focus on loving ourselves – the importance of it & how it has affected (or is it effected – i always screw them up) your journey.
and no it doesn’t have to be JUST about weight loss – all of my non-weight loss bloggy peeps are MORE than welcome to link up!
the link will be opened from february 13th until midnight on february 14th & i would love if everyone wrote a post about loving yourself/what it means/how you do it/not loving yourself enough/etc & whatever take on the subject you want to write about. it can be heartfelt, serious, inspirational, funny, whatever – or a mix of it all! just put your own twist & style into it!
then just link up your post & have fun hoppin’ around reading everyone’s posts as well & hopefully be inspired & feel the bloggy l♥ve!" <<<From Cyn's blog
Here's the post to which you can link your post if you want to write on such a subject:
http://thechunkygoddess.com/2012/02/13/meme-valentines-day-2012-the-day-of-loving-you/
I am going to work on a post for this, because I have been thinking it is something I need to evaluate right now. Thanks Cyn, for coming up with the idea and having a place to link and go read other stories.
Friday, February 10, 2012
Food Poisoning = Not Cool.
Yesterday I had to leave work early because my body was revolting against some enchiladas I had for lunch. Serves me right I guess.
I have nothing to say, I'm sitting here half awake, very dehydrated and haven't eaten for 24 hours except 1 orange last night for supper. I have already drank 80 ounces of water and it is 11:59am.
Yesterday afternoon, evening, and last night was HORRIBLE.
The trip to the baptism on Sunday is a 4 hour drive, so I had taken this afternoon off and planned to go. I am still so sick, that I have changed my travel plans and will not leave until tomorrow morning. That pretty much sucks because it shortens the amount of time I get to see my bestie and my little baby Ellie. Now it's a whirlwind trip instead of a little weekend away. I'm too sick and dizzy to be driving and why the fuck am I at my office?
Bet you this will add to a loss this week. That's one way to go about it!!!!
I have nothing to say, I'm sitting here half awake, very dehydrated and haven't eaten for 24 hours except 1 orange last night for supper. I have already drank 80 ounces of water and it is 11:59am.
Yesterday afternoon, evening, and last night was HORRIBLE.
The trip to the baptism on Sunday is a 4 hour drive, so I had taken this afternoon off and planned to go. I am still so sick, that I have changed my travel plans and will not leave until tomorrow morning. That pretty much sucks because it shortens the amount of time I get to see my bestie and my little baby Ellie. Now it's a whirlwind trip instead of a little weekend away. I'm too sick and dizzy to be driving and why the fuck am I at my office?
Bet you this will add to a loss this week. That's one way to go about it!!!!
Wednesday, February 8, 2012
Weigh In
2/1/12: 246
2/8/12: 245
One pound. Work has been wicked, I haven't been able to walk as much as I usually do. I know walking isn't strenuous, but it sure does help and pushes me through. I'm happy about the pound. This week, hope to be able to do more of my daily walking. I've been using my knee brace in the morning and again in the evenings, I don't wear it to work because it's a pain in the ass (knee). My knee does feel better, doesn't help that the weather goes from 50 degrees one day to 20 the next day.
To people who post their actual weight every week and keep a separate tab for it, etc.. I would like to applaud you and say thank you! I swear some people are just straight up bullshit, but that's their problem not mine.
I have been cruising blogs lately writing down starting weights, how long it took to get to current weight, etc.. It's a little depressing in a way because most people's starting weights are around what mine is right now. I started at 311, I was out of control and it's scary to think about how I was killing myself and living as a prisoner in my own body. I felt a little bummed out about it over the weekend because I read and wrote down a lot of numbers from blogs on Saturday morning. I almost felt embarrassed? I can't think of what word I'm looking for, but I felt weird because it took me SO LONG and my weight to get SO HIGH before I 'got it'. Before I cared. Eight months and 65 pounds is progress and I felt really celebratory about it last week, but then by Saturday I just felt stupid about it or something - like it shouldn't have been that in the first place. I felt like a jackass. It didn't last long and I know it's not about the numbers in the big picture and at least I did something about it, eventually. Anyhow, random thoughts from my crazy brain. 'Could have, would have, should have'....... none of that matters - I am doing it NOW, so I'll try to stay focused on that.
I listened to some good music on Saturday when I was feeling bummed and did LOTS of exercise and drank a ton of water & green tea. This helped me get over it and just clear my mind from the negative:
This is a big weekend for me! On Sunday, my best friend's little baby girl will be baptized and I am her Godmother. Her name is Isabelle and they call her Ellie, just like me! Look at my little angel, baby Ellie.
2/8/12: 245
One pound. Work has been wicked, I haven't been able to walk as much as I usually do. I know walking isn't strenuous, but it sure does help and pushes me through. I'm happy about the pound. This week, hope to be able to do more of my daily walking. I've been using my knee brace in the morning and again in the evenings, I don't wear it to work because it's a pain in the ass (knee). My knee does feel better, doesn't help that the weather goes from 50 degrees one day to 20 the next day.
To people who post their actual weight every week and keep a separate tab for it, etc.. I would like to applaud you and say thank you! I swear some people are just straight up bullshit, but that's their problem not mine.
I have been cruising blogs lately writing down starting weights, how long it took to get to current weight, etc.. It's a little depressing in a way because most people's starting weights are around what mine is right now. I started at 311, I was out of control and it's scary to think about how I was killing myself and living as a prisoner in my own body. I felt a little bummed out about it over the weekend because I read and wrote down a lot of numbers from blogs on Saturday morning. I almost felt embarrassed? I can't think of what word I'm looking for, but I felt weird because it took me SO LONG and my weight to get SO HIGH before I 'got it'. Before I cared. Eight months and 65 pounds is progress and I felt really celebratory about it last week, but then by Saturday I just felt stupid about it or something - like it shouldn't have been that in the first place. I felt like a jackass. It didn't last long and I know it's not about the numbers in the big picture and at least I did something about it, eventually. Anyhow, random thoughts from my crazy brain. 'Could have, would have, should have'....... none of that matters - I am doing it NOW, so I'll try to stay focused on that.
I listened to some good music on Saturday when I was feeling bummed and did LOTS of exercise and drank a ton of water & green tea. This helped me get over it and just clear my mind from the negative:
This is a big weekend for me! On Sunday, my best friend's little baby girl will be baptized and I am her Godmother. Her name is Isabelle and they call her Ellie, just like me! Look at my little angel, baby Ellie.
Tuesday, February 7, 2012
My new Best Friend - Juicer!
This is what I put in my first green juice I had a couple weeks ago. Greens, 2 stalks celery, 1 super large carrot, 1 cucumber, some cilantro, 1 pear and 1 peeled Meyer lemon.
The juicer - one of the best purchases I've made recently. The juice cup is 20 ounces, it started to overflow so I had to drink some off the top with the straw. I wasn't paying attention either, caught it just in time. I was too amazed by pushing the veggies down the chute, it's strangely entertaining. :)
This is the juicer: http://www.amazon.com/dp/B000FHQJ6C/ref=asc_df_B000FHQJ6C1911913?smid=A2R0FX412W1BDT&tag=hyprod-20&linkCode=asn&creative=395105&creativeASIN=B000FHQJ6C I ordered it Walmart and did Site to Store for free shipping.
The finished product in a measuring cup, I had to drink a little off to remove the cup from underneath the spout. I think it made a good 22-24 ounces, since it overflowed and I had to get some off twice. I have since started adding water and put it all in a glass pitcher, not always 'equal parts water'; but a good amount. So, off this I could end up with 40 ounces of product. I use 8 ounces as a serving, that is 5 servings of goodness off of that plate of veggies. I feel so much better, I drink this once a day. My guts love me for it and I feel 'lighter' and more energetic with this added into my daily routine.
*I do not dilute fruit based juices. Actually, I don't make fruit based juices too often, I have no problem eating fresh fruit. I do feel like it is more of a chore than it should be to eat greens sometimes though. I add a piece of fruit and some citrus to almost every juice to add a little sweet and the freshness and zip from the citrus. I can't say the juice sits around in the fridge much. If I make a batch Sunday night, Tuesday at lunch is probably when I'd drink it up. I don't know about oxidation, etc.. and have received a couple emails asking about that. Like anything else, I am more than willing to learn and improve as I go! Keep the comments, emails and juice recipes coming!! Thanks, guys!
The leftover pulp in the waste basket of the juicer after it was all finished.
I have since started putting plastic grocery sacks in this pulp container, it makes clean up a snap!
The pulp is very well juiced. I was scooping it out and it reminded me of play dough, so I shaped it into letters to describe the taste of the juice. YUM! It is earthy and green and tastes how I expected it to, I really get the taste of cucumber, which I LOVE. The lemon adds a freshness to it all. I love green juice! Look at the plate of ingredients and tell me this isn't doing something great for my body. Look at it again and tell me I'll get fat drinking this stuff - impossible, I tell ya. I had one of these babies for supper last night with an apple (not juiced, I ate the apple with a little peanut butter). Simple, quick and fuckloads of nutrients.
Yes, please!
Monday, February 6, 2012
No Title cuz I'm Lame today
Just checking in, I've been reading and commenting on blogs today because I got a little behind.
FYI, I totally rocked out everything on the list I posted on Saturday. MmmHmmm! I knew I just HAD to follow through and get everything done. I was really sore yesterday. I think my knee is messed up again, so took it pretty easy yesterday.
I had bet ONE DOLLAR that the Giants would win, guess how is 100 cents richer! I'm not much of a gambler, I did it mostly just for fun. I'm most happy that NFL season is over, so I can quit reading all the smack talkin' and nonsense on Facebook. I blocked posts of people who are repeat offenders, always talking about football. Now, I guess I can maybe make their posts visible again until they annoy me with whatever sport comes next.
I had no booze all of January and decided to continue for all of February, with the exception of last Wednesday. We had a special date night, so we had champagne, strawberries, chicken alfredo pasta...all sorts of good stuff. Anyhow, it took me until today to quit having constant battles with the carb monster. I have been craving pasta, pizza, mashed potatoes w/ gravy... all kinds of random shit that I haven't eaten in a while ever since that date night. Yesterday, I had few cravings. Today, I feel normal again. I made a single serving of whole wheat spaghetti on Friday with some amazing marinara with artichoke in it - then I decided no major carbs like that until the crazy cravings passed. I should have known better than to think that my one night of 'cheating' wasn't going to cost me in the big picture of things. Then again, sometimes I think I'll never learn.
No sugar and No Booze for February. Still scared as shit and wonder if I'll fail or give in. I tried to craft some valid excuse as to why I could come up with a couple more 'cheat days' this month. TOM or Valentine's Day only or my nephew's birthday for cake or my friend's 30th birthday. I actually had myself convinced that on my friend's 30th birthday, nothing 'counts', because 30 is a really depressing age. I'm trying to remember that I'd much rather reach my goal of 'no sugar' than fail myself just to eat a cupcake. You know how much I love cupcakes though. I mean, I love them. But, the goal remains and I will not give up!
Tonight: green juice for supper (I'm not that hungry and I actually feel a little sick) and maybe some almonds... Cardio Max workout and that's about it......
Told ya I'm lame today!
FYI, I totally rocked out everything on the list I posted on Saturday. MmmHmmm! I knew I just HAD to follow through and get everything done. I was really sore yesterday. I think my knee is messed up again, so took it pretty easy yesterday.
I had bet ONE DOLLAR that the Giants would win, guess how is 100 cents richer! I'm not much of a gambler, I did it mostly just for fun. I'm most happy that NFL season is over, so I can quit reading all the smack talkin' and nonsense on Facebook. I blocked posts of people who are repeat offenders, always talking about football. Now, I guess I can maybe make their posts visible again until they annoy me with whatever sport comes next.
I had no booze all of January and decided to continue for all of February, with the exception of last Wednesday. We had a special date night, so we had champagne, strawberries, chicken alfredo pasta...all sorts of good stuff. Anyhow, it took me until today to quit having constant battles with the carb monster. I have been craving pasta, pizza, mashed potatoes w/ gravy... all kinds of random shit that I haven't eaten in a while ever since that date night. Yesterday, I had few cravings. Today, I feel normal again. I made a single serving of whole wheat spaghetti on Friday with some amazing marinara with artichoke in it - then I decided no major carbs like that until the crazy cravings passed. I should have known better than to think that my one night of 'cheating' wasn't going to cost me in the big picture of things. Then again, sometimes I think I'll never learn.
No sugar and No Booze for February. Still scared as shit and wonder if I'll fail or give in. I tried to craft some valid excuse as to why I could come up with a couple more 'cheat days' this month. TOM or Valentine's Day only or my nephew's birthday for cake or my friend's 30th birthday. I actually had myself convinced that on my friend's 30th birthday, nothing 'counts', because 30 is a really depressing age. I'm trying to remember that I'd much rather reach my goal of 'no sugar' than fail myself just to eat a cupcake. You know how much I love cupcakes though. I mean, I love them. But, the goal remains and I will not give up!
Tonight: green juice for supper (I'm not that hungry and I actually feel a little sick) and maybe some almonds... Cardio Max workout and that's about it......
Told ya I'm lame today!
Saturday, February 4, 2012
Today
1. Drink 64 ounces of water
2. Drink 24 ounces of green tea
3. Not eat any desserts, sugary treats, CRAP
4. Do Biggest Loser last chance workout DVD
5. Walk 3 miles
6. Do the upper body workout in a strength max DVD
7. Replace my lunch with a freshly made juice (2 large carrots, 1.5 apples, 2 celery stalks, 1 meyer lemon (hand squeezed and added at the end))
I still have a lot of other things to complete today, that aren't 'weight loss' related - but I will work all of this into it. It is 10am, and I should have been started with stuff already.... I'm not. I'm watching CNN, blogging and sipping coffee. The day starts now and it will be a VERY productive Saturday. Make it count!
Thursday, February 2, 2012
Wednesday, February 1, 2012
February Goals
1. Buy my new treadmill! Any recommendations in the $500-700 range?
2. Go to the free gym right after work 3 days a week! I am on travel a lot this month for work, so if that is the case - still work out in a gym for 3x a week (at the hotel). This is in addition to daily walking and home workouts.
3. No booze! I feel like a rockstar after not drinking at all in January, so I will be doing the same for February. I'll admit, that is with the exception of tonight. Today we are having a very special date night for our Valentine's Day, because I am on travel a lot the next 2 weeks. There will be champagne and strawberries, oh yes there will! :) Pretty sure I was a budding alcoholic before my little challenge for January, yikes.
4. Go tanning 3x a week! I love the feeling, so I might as well start going again.
5. No desserts. No 'treats'. No ice cream. No sugar. Yeah, I just said 'no sugar'. For me, the cupcake queen. I did it for 10 days in December and I managed it, I did it for 10 when I did fruits-nuts-veggies-tea only for 10 days. I can handle it, February is the shortest month of the year... so let's go! I am SO scared of this challenge, isn't that stupid? I love sugar though, you have no idea. But, I need to rock shit out... so the challenge is on!
6. Start being serious about this item on my 30x30 list: #14. Be able to jog 3 miles without feeling or sounding like I am on the brink of death. This will probably involve going to get some proper shoes and start a training program (Couch to 5k type of thing). I saw that on one treadmill, Jillian Michaels has this little chip that goes in and the skinny bitch is yelling at you while you're on the treadmill about when to run, slow down, etc.. That will be a big focus for this month, which is going to just make the pounds d-r-o-p. You runners sure do inspire me. I'm scared!
7. I want to get to the weight of 233. I don't know if that can be done in February, but I'm going to give it one hell of a go. My highest weight EVER was 333. Yup. Uggh. I am only 13 pounds away from being 100 pounds less than my highest weight ever. I don't even know what I would do, maybe collapse in shock?! That is my next target, then after that the next target is 220, then I think I'll mosey on down to Onederland which hasn't happened since the 90's. Shit just got real! :)
8. I am going to fast for a weekend in February. My reasons are discussed in this post. It will probably be the weekend of the 17th. Tough month for scheduling, but I will only fast when I am at home because I need the balance and to be in my own space.
2. Go to the free gym right after work 3 days a week! I am on travel a lot this month for work, so if that is the case - still work out in a gym for 3x a week (at the hotel). This is in addition to daily walking and home workouts.
3. No booze! I feel like a rockstar after not drinking at all in January, so I will be doing the same for February. I'll admit, that is with the exception of tonight. Today we are having a very special date night for our Valentine's Day, because I am on travel a lot the next 2 weeks. There will be champagne and strawberries, oh yes there will! :) Pretty sure I was a budding alcoholic before my little challenge for January, yikes.
4. Go tanning 3x a week! I love the feeling, so I might as well start going again.
5. No desserts. No 'treats'. No ice cream. No sugar. Yeah, I just said 'no sugar'. For me, the cupcake queen. I did it for 10 days in December and I managed it, I did it for 10 when I did fruits-nuts-veggies-tea only for 10 days. I can handle it, February is the shortest month of the year... so let's go! I am SO scared of this challenge, isn't that stupid? I love sugar though, you have no idea. But, I need to rock shit out... so the challenge is on!
6. Start being serious about this item on my 30x30 list: #14. Be able to jog 3 miles without feeling or sounding like I am on the brink of death. This will probably involve going to get some proper shoes and start a training program (Couch to 5k type of thing). I saw that on one treadmill, Jillian Michaels has this little chip that goes in and the skinny bitch is yelling at you while you're on the treadmill about when to run, slow down, etc.. That will be a big focus for this month, which is going to just make the pounds d-r-o-p. You runners sure do inspire me. I'm scared!
7. I want to get to the weight of 233. I don't know if that can be done in February, but I'm going to give it one hell of a go. My highest weight EVER was 333. Yup. Uggh. I am only 13 pounds away from being 100 pounds less than my highest weight ever. I don't even know what I would do, maybe collapse in shock?! That is my next target, then after that the next target is 220, then I think I'll mosey on down to Onederland which hasn't happened since the 90's. Shit just got real! :)
8. I am going to fast for a weekend in February. My reasons are discussed in this post. It will probably be the weekend of the 17th. Tough month for scheduling, but I will only fast when I am at home because I need the balance and to be in my own space.
Weigh In
June 6, 2011: 311
Jan 25, 2012: 248
Feb 1, 2012: 246
65 Pounds in 8 months!!!!
I am really excited! It's not very often I look at how many pounds I've lost 'overall' - I always just go week by week. Obviously, I notice when I hit 40 or 50 - but really, I just kept on truckin' through the weeks as they came. Here I am 8 months and 65 pounds. I can't even remember the last time I was under 250. I can't remember the last time I went into a store and didn't have to automatically find the BIGGEST size they carried. Most of all, I can't remember being this aware of my body. I know how it works now, I know why I have all these muscles and joints - they allow me to move it, move it & shake it, shake it! I know how to treat my body, how to nourish it - how to keep the plumbing system maintained, how to keep my skin clear and beautiful, how to keep my hair shiny and healthy, how to protect and strengthen my knees & back which have given my problems for years..... the list goes on and on.
I don't know what else to say - I'm so happy I teared up a little bit because I didn't think I could do this. I have punched 311-246 into the calculator about 10 times. Is the math right? Did I really just lose 65 pounds in 8 months? I checked again and it still comes out to 65, so I guess it must be right. Once I started thinking I could, it just kept happening. Life tried to hold me down, people doubted me.. but here I am! I had a two month stall where I only lost 3 pounds, but honestly I think that helped me to kill it these most recent 2 months and lose 15 pounds. Just keep going. That's my only advice - do not give up because you're worth it.
I'm so happy I can't sit still, so I'm off for a walk now! I love that my job allows 30 minutes of walking every day (in addition to 30 minute lunch and two 15 minute breaks - which I also utilize for walking many times). All employers should be doing this for their employees health!
I'll do a February goals post later; but please excuse me for now because I'm off to walk on some sunshine.................... ;)
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